Vanilla Ice To Do Home Improvement Show?

Breaking from our usual politically oriented fare, I thought this might be a fun diversion. I was told by a friend (hi Joh!) that Robert Mathew Van Winkle (we affectionately know him as Vanilla Ice) was going to be leading a home improvement show on the DIY network. And sure enough, this is true.

So, I couldn't help but spend a couple of minutes putting some new lyrics to his most famous song.

(to the tune of Ice Ice Baby)

Alright stop, carpentrate and listen
Ice is back with a whole new profession
Grab some lumber and hold it tightly
With a saw and a level on prime time nightly
Will it pass code? Yo I don't know.
Call the inspector and he'll show.
To the extreme now I won't have to panhandle
Electrician I'm not though you might need a candle
I'll build it good so it won't go boom
Drywall this bitch then do another room
Deadly if my work is shoddy
You can use it but don't flush the potty
Love it or leave it the place will be great
When I do plumbing yo I don't play
If there is a problem, yo I'll solve it
Check out this blade while my saw revolves it

Rehab it ice ice baby (repeat x4)

(Okay ... who can spring for studio time so we can record this and make it a YouTube hit? I can play bass.)